Munchausen Syndrome by proxy is something you do not often hear about. That is unless we see a high profile case regarding the well being of a child. Even then, we never often hear the full story. We hear about the parent who is being charged, perhaps a little bit about the children.
However, we never really hear about the other parent, or why the other parent isn't around. Many times it is due to the failure of not only the family court system, but the child welfare system and healthcare system, and such high profile systems don't typically like to admit fault.
Many would rather not bring it up at all. Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy is, very briefly, a condition in which the parent or caregiver fabricates or induces symptoms of physical or mental illness in the child, according to the National Health Service. In the Diagnostic & Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5) the condition is recognized as a “factitious disorder imposed on another''. Oftentimes, these caregivers fool nurses, doctors, attorneys, social workers, their family members, coparents, neighbors and more.
There has always been a lack of knowledge and the acknowledgment of Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy by the family court system. Family courts so often deal with parents who have such high conflict, they accuse each other of drastic things. For a parent to sicken their child, is one of the most drastic things that could happen, however, we often fail to acknowledge the lengths some will go to gain from others, no matter the cost.
There have been few high profile cases that have come to light regarding Munchhausen by Proxy cases, and in many, the parents in these cases have fooled their coparents, or have made the family court restrict access to the other parent. This restriction to access, can often help those who are imposing these false illnesses on their children. Some high profile cases include the famous Gypsy Rose case, which now even has a documentary, and the Lacey Spear case in Kentucky.
Those who may be familiar with the Gypsy Rose case may know that her mother coached her daughter, and made in her ill in a possible attempt to gain fame, monetary compensation, control or other reasons. Deedee, Gypsy's mother, even lied to Gypsy about her age, making her believe she was at least four years younger than she actually was.
According to Buzzfeed, Gypsy's father called her on her 18th birthday to wish her a happy 18th birthday, Deedee interrupted the call stating that he was making Gypsy upset because Gypsy Rose believed she was only 14 years old.
Not only this but Gypsy's father genuinely believed Gypsy to be sick, and sent $1,200 per month in child support, tv sets, gifts, and other electronics. Since Deedee was a trained nurse assistant, he never doubted her otherwise, until the inconsistencies occurred, and even then, no one would listen.
In Lacey Spear's case, her son was led to believe her father was a police office named Blake who died in a car accident. However, he was actually a man named Chris Hillschild who threatened to call the police on Lacey's mother before they moved away. Lacey not only made her child sick enough to become hospitalized, but poisoned him while he was in the hospital, which led to her eventually being caught.
These are not the only two cases in which the family court system and caseworkers have failed children. However, when parents bring Munchhausen Syndrome to court, we still do not investigate or take it seriously.
Munchhausen Syndrome was first identified in 1951 and is named after Baron von Munchhausen. Although we have a syndrome and it's counterpart, Munchhausen by Proxy, that have been identified for over 70 years and have been admitted into the DSM-5, we still do not acknowledge it as a factor in family court.
Studies which include Munchhausen Syndrome by Proxy, we often see that parental alienation and these syndromes often coincide. Many parents who end up being accused of this syndrome, are also often accused of keeping the other parent distant from the children.
If you are experiencing a situation in which you believe your child is a victim of Munchhausen Syndrome by Proxy, ensure that you keep all documentation from doctor's office's, social workers, therapists, and communication and documentation from your coparent. When needed, ask for a second opinion by a doctor of your choice. Ensure that you are proactive, and research your children's symptoms.
Ensure that you attend each doctor's appointment. If your coparent does not allow you to attend doctors appointments, you can make a motion in court to add that to your court order, or you can contact the insurance office to see what claims have been made to the insurance and from whom and follow up on the appointment. When doing this ensure, you have your court order and the child's birth certificate, as doctors offices and insurance offices may request this information.
For the Love of Children Consulting is a coparenting and high conflict consulting firm located in Hampton Roads, Virginia. They provide resources, information and guidance for parents, stepparents, family members, businesses, and schools who are experiencing coparenting difficulties. Each month For the Love of Children Consulting has anonymous support groups and a monthly webinar available at no cost.
